We’ve all been down the break-up road before. Whether you’re the dumper or the dumpee, and whether the relationship was three weeks or three years long, going through a break-up is never an easy feat.
There will be times when all you want to do is hide in your bed in your pajamas, eating a pint of Half Baked Ben & Jerry’s, watching chick flicks and thinking of excuses to cry. There will be times where you want to call up your ex and scream strings of profanities. Then there will be times where you will want to put on your hottest body-con dress and pumps, or spiffiest suit and tie, for a flirty, rebound-searching—oops, soul-searching—night out on the town.
Look to these steps as guidelines for getting through a break-up.
1) Let yourself cry. For two or three days, just let yourself go. It’s completely natural and healthy to need to let out every last tear in your body. Don’t leave the house if you don’t want to. This is the annoying Taylor Swift stage. The Ben & Jerry’s stage. Calories don’t count if it’s two days after a break-up.
2) Pick yourself up. It’s been a couple of days, and now it’s time to get back up again. Call some friends to get lunch or dinner, go shopping, run some errands, go to the gym, or to get out of the house.
3) Surround yourself. Being alone to grieve and think is healthy, but after a certain period of time, it might become harmful. Make efforts to see your friends and be with family if you can. Talking to others about what you’re going through and how you’re feeling is important to getting through this process. You might be surprised by the advice and comfort you will receive from those who love you.
4) Let yourself be angry, but then move on. There are stages of grief, and it’s natural to be angry at your ex. Let yourself be upset and hurt and angry, but then let it go. Understand that the relationship has ended, and let it go. Throw away borrowed clothes and framed pictures. Let it go.
5) Take up a new hobby. Find something to do, and do it. You will be surprised to notice just how much free time and money you have by being newly single. Take advantage of it. Better yourself, and you will feel much happier.
6) Move on. After however long it takes, understand that there are other people to be seen and known and loved. Find them.
