There are times when you call yourself “dumb,” “fat,” or “ugly,” but no matter how much you may not want to believe or notice it, you are in fact your own worse critic. For some, self-criticism can be a method to keep them grounded and humble. Yet, there are others who believe in their self-criticism and transform it into self-loathing. When you have a low sense of self, it is difficult to allow positivity into your daily life; to the point where you will miss all of the good that you are capable of. So how do you start loving yourself, even when you do not feel like you should? Psychologytoday.com has great tips and techniques that will help you feel better about yourself.
These are not feelings that can change over-night; therefore, it is okay to take time to see what values you have. Psychologytoday.com acknowledges that “with practice, time and patience, there’s a good chance you will begin to view yourself more positively.” When you feel less adequate to those around you, try to “rationalize your response.” If a situation does not go your way, it is not because you’re not good enough. Assess the situation and understand all the factors that play into your lack of self-esteem at the moment. Once you consider all of the possibilities, you can avoid any costly decisions next time. You also have to realize that there are different opportunities for everyone. Your chance will come when you are fully prepared.
But as psychpologytoday.com notes, “unfortunately, you might also find that you remain committed to your old, self-critical beliefs – irrationally fighting the new, more positive thoughts.” Therefore, rationalizing your response may not work. But do not give into your self-criticism, instead ‘work to understand how you arrived at it’”.
Was there something that happened in your past that made you not believe your self-worth in the present? Psychologytoday.com states that “once you ’get’ this, you will be naturally more likely to be less self-critical.” Take the time to figure out why a particular situation makes you stop believing in yourself. By doing this, you will develop a “compassionate self-awareness,” which will help you become less critical of yourself. This kind of self-awareness can bring positivity into your life because it will help you take away the negativity by pulling out the root. After discovering where the negativity comes from, you can make room for self-love.