Are you a people pleaser? Someone who is constantly doing things for other people without giving your thoughts, feelings, wants, or emotions a second thought? While you may think this is a redeeming quality about yourself, it’s not. Sure, you care about others enough to put them before yourself, but more times than not you get carried away. You’re jumping through hoops for them, and pretty soon, instead of appreciating all you’ve done, they’re doing nothing but taking advantage of your kindness.
Since our birth, today’s society has emphasized the importance of being accepted by others, rather than having self-worth and respect. Our new values are to do whatever we can for others to make them like us, and having a love for ones’ self has become not only rare, but even a taboo! You begin to feel guilty for being one of those few people with self-confidence.
There is only one way to fix this, and while cliché, it’s actually a lot simpler than you probably would have ever thought. Simply live in the moment – really be in it. It’s a difficult thing to do at first because we’re so used to accepting anxiety as a norm. We’re constantly thinking about what else we have to do and what “needs” to get done in our day, that whenever we begin a project or errand, we’re never fully in it, but rather focus on the next thing! Next time you feel yourself doing this, simply examine yourself. Ask yourself simple questions to keep you grounded:
“Where am I right now?”
“What time is it?”
“What am I doing?”
Then get down to the more important aspect. Ask yourself “Why am I doing this?” or “Is this really what I want?” Don’t consider this selfish! Somehow or another, self worth has been morphed into this ideology that it’s selfishness. Do not make this mistake. Doing things for yourself is the most important thing you can do. After all, it is your life.
