6 Ways to Know When Your Partner is Bored in Bed

The number-one statement no man or women ever wants to hear is that their partner is bored in bed. However, while in a long term relationship, sex can often become a routine and sometimes even dull. The best way to rectify a limp sex life is to know that you or your partner is in fact bored in bed. Once you realize this, you can then try to find ways to connect again. With some tips from Menshealth.com’s “5 Signs You Bore Her in Bed: And how to win back her attention—in a big way,” here is a list of signs that indicate that your partner is bored in bed and how to spice things up.

1. Going to bed at different times
Sure, you both may have different work schedules that cause you to become tired at different time at night. Tiredness can be an excuse to not have sex, “but there’s a more likely reason for her early bedtime: she’s aiming to avoid intimacy.” This goes for men as well. Although it may be hard to believe that men would want to avoid intimacy, it can happen if he is bored. So if you encounter an instance where you feel as if your partner is opting out of sex, try to introduce foreplay earlier in the evening.

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2. Unwilling to change positions
Finding positions that achieve the greatest amount of pleasure for each of you is great. However, if you want to do them all the time, your sex life can get dull at some point. Men’s Health believes that ultimately, “She favors the move that she knows gets you off fastest.” This may not mean that she is bored, but it can definitely take the excitement out of sex. To fix this, do research together and do not be afraid to be silly. Find positions you are both willing to try, have fun looking at all the possibilities and laugh with each other. Ultimately, this will help you learn more about each other which always adds to intimacy and enhances the sexual experience.

3. Rather emotionally connect with friends
Choosing your friends over your partner is a big red flag that can show you that the spark may have left the relationship. Your partner should be that: a partner. Therefore, if you find yourself spending more time with your friends for a sense of fulfillment, then you are ignoring the person who is supposed to be your emotional confidant. Having a talk with your partner if you start to feel left out is the first step in figuring out whether or not they are in fact bored.

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4. Avoiding foreplay
Okay, now foreplay is not for everyone. Some people like to skip it all together; however, it can really help set the mood and gets the libido going. As Men’s Health notes, for a woman “to refuse her own pleasure, that’s a bad sign, buddy.” Foreplay may not be for you, but it can help you build up you and your partner’s sex drive. Start off small with soft kisses and sweet whispers, and then let the moment come naturally.

5. Rushing sex when it’s not a quickie
If “she asks, “Did you finish?” before you actually did,” then there is trouble in paradise. Sex should not be rushed at all, no matter what gender you are. There may be extenuating circumstances that call for you to want to get sex “over with.” However, that kind of mentality can put a strain on your overall relationship because feelings of inadequacy can arise. If you both are in your own place, then there is no reason to rush sex. Do not rush each other to climax, just enjoy the moment.

6. Their clothes stay on
Although, “sometimes, it’s erotic to keep an article of clothing on—but apart from a rushed-and-raunchy quickie, a refusal to get totally nude can be a sign she’s not really interested in connecting with you.” Being able to be completely naked with your partner suggests that you are comfortable with them and not afraid of them seeing your flaws. Again, foreplay is another way to address this situation where you can use clothes as a way to be playful and sensual with each other.

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After all of these tips are considered, the number-one best way to help you or your partner to revive you sex life is to be completely honest. Find a way to acknowledge that your bedroom performance needs to be enhanced without making each other feel bad. If boredom with sex is a problem, do not point fingers; instead, talk to each other and find the best ways to bring spontaneity, pleasure, and fun back into the relationship.

 

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